Starting over…Again.

It has been way too long since I posted to this blog. Maybe because my weight loss has been nothing but a HUGE weight gain. This past month has been a nightmare. I never thought I would allow personal issues to affect this journey but apparently I thought wrong. I never believed I was an emotional eater, always figured I just like to eat regardless of my family life. However over this whole ordeal I broke down and had the “I don’t care” attitude. Which, of course, resulted in a 20lb weight gain. I know 20lbs in a month can’t be realistic but that’s what the scale is showing me. I had already gained about 20lbs before this started and it just snowballed from there. I did exercise here and there but made no effort to log any food or even cared what I was eating. My attitude was that of “oh, come Monday I am getting back on track.” As we all know Monday never came. But finally being around friends again I have a support system I never had before. Never had anyone push me to go to the gym or even cared if I did. My friends now are urging me to not gain all this weight back and even want to exercise with me saying I inspire them. So come Monday I will be starting the Insanity workout with my friend. She wants to lose about 30lbs so we basically have the same goal. I’ve never had an issue putting in a hard workout but without a gym it makes it a little difficult in my opinion. This workout looks pretty crazy though so I’m sure it’s going to kill me for awhile, which is a great thing! I have to start logging my food again and learn that no matter what personal issues I face this is the one thing I CAN control.

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Back on Track

Been MIA for awhile now, probably been stuffing my face too much to actually blog but I think I’m seriously back now. I have got way out of control and let myself get up to 210 at my last weigh in. Even though I’m not so focused on an actual number goal I am starting to feel like an umpa lumpa! It amazes me that I even feel this way and this weight considering a few years ago I had another 100 pounds on me! I know my body has adjusted to my exercise routine but it’s the food that’s killing me this time. I just have no will power and continue to indulge in anything I please! That’s proven to be a complete disaster! Girl Scout season has also approached and we all know how those are! I bought 9 boxes from my niece alone! So my goal is still 25lbs by mid May and then I will reevaluate! Anyone using Loseit! let me know so I can add you and we can motivate each other!

25lbs or Bust

Where to begin… I’ve just been a complete mess and need to stop before things get real ugly for me. I have been eating non stop, only exercising 4 days a week and not really caring. I’m not sure where all this came from but if I’m not careful I will be up to a weight I don’t want to be. I’m not sure if it’s the new job or schedule but I have to refocus and get back on it. I had promised myself not to get passed 200 but at the beginning of this week I was 204 so I’m hoping to see a decent loss by the time I actually post this. Let’s see what happens and hope I get my drive back!

Weight as of 02/20/11: 199.0 – down 5lbs.

A Mess!

I am a straight mess! Nothing but gaining and eating! I am so disappointed in myself and the non stop eating sessions. I have been working out but still gaining! I HAVE to turn this around! Dont even feel like blogging cause things have been so horrible! Till next week…

Weight as of 01/23/2011: 200.2! A sad, sad day!

New Year!

Wow didn’t realize I haven’t updated since November! So crazy that 2010 is already over. My weight loss has not been that great over this past year. I’ve gone up and down every month with the last month being the absolute worst! I have yet to lose my cruise weight and with the holidays I have just added to the problem. However with this new year will start a new plan. I am determined to get to at least 175lbs and revaluate from there. My goal is to reach that weight by summer time. Have to remember to go back to my old ways of doing things. Burn more and eat less!
Oh and I have started a new job that has proved to be a little challenging. I am pushing myself to go to the gym every morning before work cause I know I won’t go afterwards. I am good all day but then I get home and go crazy. So I need to get that under control real quick.

Weigh in as of 01/02/11: 196.0

Food Cruise

OMG! I just got back from my 4 day cruise to Mexico and I learned I have NO self control. I ate so much I was full at every meal but went and ate anyways! Its crazy how much food is available. Plus it was good too! Dessert at every meal was definitely my downfall. We would even get food to take back to the room after dinner even though we were stuffed. Pure greediness at it’s best! So when we came home I weighed in but refused to believe what I saw on the scale. It’s not possible that I gained that much weight over 4 days. I didn’t exercise a lot but I did put in 60 mins 3 out of the 4 days. Yes I probably ate 6k calories a day but still! Lol! So as I write this I’m hoping my weigh in on Wednesday doesn’t look as bad as it was on Saturday! Plus now I have Thanksgiving to contend with! Wish me luck!

Weight as of 11/24/2010: 194.4 – that’s up 10.8! Yikes!

HELP ME!

Before I write this I will break down all that I have ate today: cereal, granola bar, peanut butter sandwich, pretzels, double cheeseburger, onion rings, taco, 2 doughnuts and about 6 Oreos. Now that I am totally embarrassed I could probably stop this post and you will understand my problem. For the past couple of weeks I have been on a downward spiral. I have been trying to figure out what is going on with me and all this eating. First off I will say I have never thought of myself as a emotional eater. I don’t recall any time when I’ve been upset and reached for food. However that’s the only explanation for this amount of food I have been taken in recently. I won’t say I have been stressed out but there has been some issues that have come up that may be a factor in all this. I wake up every morning thinking today is going to be a good day. I go put in a full workout, eat lunch and breakfast without any problems. Then comes dinner time I am a complete mess and once I start screwing up I just continue. As much as I recognize some of the problems I am facing I have one more that is much bigger than all this. I don’t care as much as I should when I eat all this crap. I use to have that sense of guilt after I ate something I shouldn’t. I regretted my decision almost as soon as I made it. What scares me the most about this is that I know without effort I will be right back to 350+ pounds if I don’t change this attitude. I realize most people fail at weight loss and gain back weight, sometimes even more than they originally weighed. I can’t imagine going back to that size and having to lose it all over again. This has taken me 2yrs to get where I’m at and I just don’t know if I would have it in me to do it again. I’m hoping that being honest and writing this will give me a wake up call to get my act together. As I write this I still have 4 days before weigh in so maybe I will see a little change before then. Until next week…

Weight as of 11/10/2010: 183.6 up again!

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